Arrrg! Why is it so difficult to write something for one environment...but so easy to just flow in another? I could write page after page of a blog about something I'm interested in, but ask me to write a Statement of Purpose or a research paper and my mind goes blank. Blech.

I've been working on this damn two paged statement for months now. Which on one hand makes me feel like I'm doing something right since all I hear is how this may be one of the most difficult papers I will have to write. But on the other hand it's like...c'mon! I wrote a first draft a while back with an Indiana Jones theme...which, though cute, was pretty floopydoopy and informal. I've taken on a couple other themes to try, but I'm not sure if they're coming out very smooth. I wish I was just one of those writers that could flow out papers and sound intelligent and confident, but not egotistical the first shot.

Maybe if I break down the "question" I can figure out how to put it all together better. Lets see...

"A one to two page double-spaced typewritten statement of purpose, describing your interest in I/O Psychology, reasons for pursuing graduate education, and educational and career goals within and beyond the program."

I can see this broken down into these questions:

1. What is my interest in I/O Psychology?


2. What are my reasons for pursuing graduate education?

With graduate education I'm hoping to find a few things. Firstly, the specific training to accomplish my goals mentioned above. Though I may have a natural desire to make a change, there is still a lot for me to learn in order to do it effectively. With the study of the different focuses I'm interested in, I plan on being able to gain the knowledge and skills to make that change. Also, I'm still not sure exactly what career path I would like to pursue and I'm hoping that the exposure to new people that have similar goals as well as through the internship requirement that I will find a career to match my interests. I'm also aware that by attaining my Masters I will have more clout and should be able to move more swiftly into a position I enjoy, rather than having to struggle hard to create it from the ground up.

3. What are my educational goals within the program?

While working towards my Masters, I'd like to take courses that will help me specialize on my specific interests - communication, motivation, job satisfaction, group cohesion, and effectiveness. By expanding my knowledge and personally improving my own abilities in these topics I will be more prepared to use them in a career. Also, I'm interested in becoming a part of any studies concerning these topics done through the university and perhaps even starting my own. For example, I'm presently conducting a small scale study on job satisfaction at the restaurant that I work. By using Richard Hackman's work on motivation potential, I've created a survey based study and am using the results to write my entry paper. I'd like to continue experiments like this through my graduate years, as I find real world application of what I'm studying an essential part of my education. Additionally, I plan on continuing high academic achievement and hope to get to know many of the professors during my Undergrad studies.

4. Career goals within?

As I mentioned briefly, I've been working at a restaurant as a server and have recently been recruited to a Mid-Manager position. I see myself in a unique position to take the experience as a server as well as the results from my research and apply them effectively as a manager in hopes of improving the job-satisfaction of my co-workers. By the time school starts in the Fall of 2008, I will have taken on many new skills and responsibilities as a manager including training, employee relations and satisfaction, etc. Presently, my career goals while attending SJSU are to maintain the manager position and perhaps advance. I see the lessons learned through that experience as essential for a career following my Masters work.

5. Educational goals beyond the program?


6. Career goals beyond?

There! Now to see if I can put that all into one full paper. I think this was a VERY helpful exercise!

So, I've arrived in Virginia! The plane ride was long and took 5 hours, yet I left at 8:40 am and arrived at 4:40 pm. Time travel IS possible! I went into the future three hours landing at Dulles Washington Airport.

I was very sad leaving Shel this morning. It was probably a good thing she didn't drive me to the airport though...we've missed planes that way. Instead I got a ride from the always generous Nana (Shel's). I flew jet blue, which was surprisingly nice! No first class (which I wouldn't have flown anyway), but they offered lots of different snacks and all you wanted. They also had a personal TV on the back of the chair in front of you...and the headphone jack to REGULAR headphones. You didn't have to buy the two-pronged ones for $5.

Reuniting with people after a while is always kind of awkward. It's been about 8 months since I've seen my dad, and 10 or so since I've seen my step mom and stepbrother. Luckily my 8 year old cutie lil' bro ran shamelessly up to me and gave me a huge huge hug. My "Momish" as I like to call her, gripped me tight and to both our surprise broke out in tears with how much she had missed me. Then came the daddy hug. Always the sentimental giant...I love my daddy.

Of course it was discussed how I'm "Too Skinny!" and such...so we headed to Costco where they bought a ton of steaks and cheese and crackers and fruit and such. Mmmmmmm, steak, yeesssssmmmm. While there, coincidently, one of my Maryland friends sends me a text message asking when I would be in town. I told her I just landed in DC and she was very excited, encouraging me to come to a club with them and party. I told her that it sounded like fun but I was going to spend the time with my family. That girl parties SO much.

Yummy steaks for dinner, and then my dad, momish, and I got on to discussing my real mom. My dad mentioned that he had come across my flickr account, which immediately scared me! I couldn't remember what photos I had posted in there! Then he mentioned one specifically, that said made him cry.

*PICTURE REMOVED - doesnt need to be here *

This is a photo I put together for N3S, a sort of PostSecret blog we had going on in Yahoo 360.

It sparked a long conversation about how my mom thinks and how she acts toward me and so on. I was really really impressed on how it all went down. We tried to figure out why my mom just wont commit to having a relationship with me. That even though I've told her how I hurt and made the effort - she still just shuts me out of her life. We discussed how my mentality is a very straightforward one - Here's a problem, lets face it and fix it. I do that with everything. However, her mentality MUST be - Here's a problem, I'm going to run away from it, it's too painful. And my extreme desire to have a mom in her is wasted as my words bounce off her back as she runs away form me.

What is the trigger that will make her turn and face me? Face the pain and guilt I know she has? To realize that I am so willing to forgive her and create a future...if she would ONLY want it too. I figured that it's very easy to ignore that guilt and pain as it piles up in the dark corners of her mind, because I'm not present in her life every day. She doesn't see me  but once every year or two now, and our phone conversations are months apart. I've never seen one photo of my brother or I in her house when I've visit...we just aren't there.

So dad, impressing me with his uber maturity and love, says that its partly his fault. He never sent her pictures of us or what we were doing. I reminded him what the great Tyler Durden said "You choose your own level of involvement", and he agreed but says he's willing to take some responsibility. Then he had the amazing idea to create a sort of scrap book for her. Having pictures of us growing up with notes about what we were doing. He said to avoid the "Look what WE were doing" aspect, he'll write her a very sincere letter explaining it.

*SHOCK*

That is probably the most sensitive thing I have ever heard my dad say...let ALONE toward my mom.  BRAVO DAD!

He thinks that maybe by having this, she will want to make the connection. That by flipping through the book and seeing what she missed, that she will want to spring into action and create something new. Even if its just a friendship with me now. We'll be starting our project soon I'd imagine...

For now, our Turkey Day plans are to drive out to Maryland to spend it with my Grandparents and aunts! How wonderful! It's been a long time

I miss my baby though. So so very much. I'm laying in this big empty "guest bed" and know that when I reach out my arm to drape over her in my sleep...she wont be there to wiggle back up against me. And I know that our big bed at home is going to seem lonely to her too...probably worse since she's used to having me in it with her.

Let YET another countdown begin: 13 days

Finally I had my last day at my OB job. I had had such high hopes going into that job last month. I was thinking I would be this mega-outdoor freak. Taking advantage of all the free gear rentals and classes. I wanted to build my resume for a potential job doing outdoor psychology stuff. Well it took me a couple of weeks to realize that's not what I had in store for me with that job. I was simply a shop-bitch. I moved skies, vacuumed the front, worked the registered, entered data, rolled tents, cleaned boats, priced inventory, answered phones, wrote out rental forms...

Me cleaning boats two days into the job:



Me with the price gun weeks into the job:



I often sent pictures of myself from my camera to Shel at work.

Totally not my game. Not only that, but it was very lonely. I had no real co-workers to share the work with in this tiny shop. I had the two bosses here and there, who were young and once had a spark of life and adventure in them. But unfortunately now they were the poster children of what the American Dream of owning a business, especially as a couple, can do to you. Good people. I hope they sell that place and get back to their adventures after 8 years.

So yeah, Friday was my last day. I tried to wrap up all the projects I had started. Made sure that all the inventory was priced and separated. That there was no feelings of "well she doesn't give a shit so she's going to do a half-ass job". I don't like half ass jobs and I don't like screwing people over. I worked a few minutes over what they had me scheduled (from 10am - 6pm) just to make sure all was done- and then I hoped on my bike and headed straight to RR.

As I changed in the Ladies room- tucking my shirt in, straightening my collar, tying on my apron and re-putting-up my hair...I felt kind of like a super hero. A super hero that just changed from sales bitch to mega super waitress! I even said aloud as I walked out the door "I now don my waitress persona!" I like that job. It's a lot of fun.

That reminds me! I worked a double at RR on Wednesday. In my first shift I was hanging with the managers, which I have established a relatively no BS relationship with...and now am friends! We were discussing the new batch of folks coming in for orientation and what we thought of them. I had said that one of them looks like they may eventually strive for a manager- older, knowledgeable, dedicated, etc. Then the big boss manager cocked her head and said to me "Hmm...What do YOU think about being a Mid [Manager]" I was flattered! I had thought this woman potentially disliked me and my wrinkly, non-straight name tagged, self! I played it cool though. I said "Hmm...yeah I could dig that. I'm going to be gone though, for two weeks" The other manager, who I love, said "Well how about this- when you come back we'll get you trained as a bartender then begin your training as a manager."

Did my ego boost! I still played it cool of course and said "I'd love to!" If I could gain and maintain a manager position through my Graduate studies I think that would provide a significant pimp on my resume as well as provide me with the fun and flexible schedule I'm looking for! Sure I'd be a manager at a "burger joint", but I'm pretty proud of my ascension through the ranks in less than 5 months!

Anyway! This blog has had next to nothing to do with the title as of yet...

One of the reasons I wanted to cut back on my jobs is that the time crunch to study for the GRE and get my application ready is so intense...and I haven't even STARTED school yet! I knew that it would only increase. I also knew that the job(s) with the most flexible schedules and highest pay would win out. And that's being a waitress ladies and gents...without a doubt. And it's about 1 million times more FUN than the OB job.

So I quit the OB job with just enough time to...well not really because I worked today (Sat) and am working a double tomorrow at RR...but...well, my GRE is this Monday. I haven't been able to study much for it so was just cramming with the Software I was provided for studying. I've taken several pre-tests and have done relatively ok on all sections, Math included! I'm pretty confident I'll do OK. Can't help be a little nervous though.

After about 3pm on Monday, I'll have one more thing out of the way for my application process. That is of course unless I do horribly and have to retake it. And in that case I'll only be more prepared and do better! After that I'll focus all my extra time (HAHAHA! What's that?) on getting that job-satisfaction research paper done. Then I will just have my Statement of Purpose, which I tried to write a month or so ago...but already I know it's going to be completely different. Which is a good thing because it means I've learned SO MUCH in the past month

Now, before I forget...Where's George?!

As a waitress I walk away with a little wad-o-cash every shift, which I love. Ever since I got my first checking account and debit card at 18 I just haven't been that big on carrying cash. But now I can't really help it, I'm handling that dirty green paper all the time! How prehistoric. One cool thing though, is that I keep coming across those " www.WheresGeorge.com" bills.

Now, I'm a dork at heart...and I find so much THRILL in the idea of seeing where my bill has been. So I've collected a little bundle of 1's, 5's, 10's and 20's and started an account there. I've entered them all in to track their travels. Unfortunately not many people find as much AWE in this system as I do and consistently I'm the only one to track the bill besides the starter. And usually it's only gone a few miles since it's original entry. BUT I've got some ideas:

1. I'm flying to Virginia this coming Wednesday to visit with my Daddio (no longer in Texas) and family for Thanksgiving. I plan to take these bills and spend them in the layover airports and over there on the East. If ANYONE reports those bills from there it'll have traveled at least 3000 miles! Mwahahahaaa!

2. To write a nice note like "Please track me! I've traveled far from my home, wouldn't you like to see?" or something like that. I figure I'll spark the innate human curiosity and tendency to comply to bend to my Where's Georging Will.

3. Pray. Hahaha!

Ok, I'm not as obsessed with the project as that may have seemed, I just think it's neat. Have you ever done it? You should! Each little dollar has it's own story. I have been putting a little story with it- where I got it and what I plan on doing with it. Hehehe!

Now to bed.

Putting on Radiohead usually lets the thoughts run free. I love Radiohead. They have a new album out and took a unique approach to releasing it - they put it up on their website for free. Totally free. However, if you wanted, you could pay for it. The me from a few years ago, even though I loved Radiohead then, would have taken it for free. But I paid $11something for it this time around. By choice. Is that a sign of maturity? Probably.

I recommend doing the same, but I know Radiohead isn't for everyone - Radiohead Pimp Here.

Onward.

I'm wondering what I'm doing in life. I do it a lot I suppose. Who knows how many blogs I've written about it. But the point is, I'm scared. I'm scared right now that I've wandered into the hamster wheel without even knowing it. Have I taken on the grind? Are my dreams fading from reality as I put my head down and muscle into the job-wind full force? I think I've lost sight of them.

I feel like I have no moments to myself or to share with Shel. All the non-work time I have is spent sleeping, eating, or thinking about what I should be doing next. I don't see an end to it. The only way I'm able to have the brain-time to write this and listen to music is because I was commanded to take a sick day from my jobs. I've gotten myself a little bug and have been home all day...which is starting to drive me mad.

Shel and I have been questioning whether THIS is what everyone does. Do they come home from work too exhausted to converse? To plan? To eat healthy? To read? To have long passionate sex? To muse about dreams? Is this what I have to look forward to in "the Real World"? I really want someone to tell me no. I really want someone to rub my shoulders and say, no this isn't it. That you're on the right path, you'll see.

If this is what life is...well...god I don't want to have to suffer it for another 70 years. I enjoy my date nights, my cuddles, my chocolate, my orgasms...but is that all there is? How can I turn this into my dreams? I don't want to be another person that scoffs at someone younger than me in a few years saying "welcome to the real world". That's like a perpetuation of shit-life. Welcome to the real world means...you naive thing, now you'll know how hard I'VE had it. But I feel that sentiment hardening me, like some...strange turtle shell growing on me.

Is the way to fulfillment throwing everything to the wind and just going OUT there? Won't I lose the people I love so much if I do that? Is the way to have my own business and live the "American Dream"? I tried that, and it isn't as dreamy as "they" would like you to believe. The stress is more costly than the freedom it affords you.

So I'm trying a new path. Work my ass off. I went to the extreme at first, as I usually do...I got three jobs (four if you counted the failing business). Frantically I tried to find salvation in a paycheck or three. Sure it brought some calm in some ways - I knew we'd make rent and utilities. We were able to spend a bit more on entertainment when we had the time to enjoy it. But the consequences were that I am never around. If I'm not working one job, its the other, and quite possibly both.

It's my goal to get away from the frantic part time jobs, and that's why I'm headed off to Graduate School. I've already dumped one of the part times, phew! *the pendulum begins it's glide back to the center* But Masters work takes at least two years, and is only going to provide MORE stress and time away from home than I already have. Can my sanity last those years?

I suppose it can, right? I'm not the first person to do all this stuff. And I'm sure I'm not the first person to be afraid, or hopeful that there will be something more enriching in the future.

Awareness is the first step.

end.

*Note from the brain - you have witnessed the evaluative and self-calming thought process of Dani from panicked start to confident finish.*

As you may have noticed I changed the look of my blog from the angry goth looking chick I named Lisa to flowers and a pic that was taken of a drawing of Shel's in the sand. She loves me obviously!

Why did I do this? Well beside the fact it's nice to have a change of pace every once and a while....did you notice the comments on my Pet Peeves of a waitress blog? Specifically the ones by a person named "Springs1". I began to realize that I am PUBLIC. I knew I was public, but their comments just kind of made it a reality. It doesn't bother me that I got comments from her/him, that's cool...its the fact that they felt so aggressive towards me!

I realized that most of the people that will read this already know me. They know I'm not a bitch, and most likely just will support me in my times of venting and pet peeves. But to those that don't know me...they may have seen me as a bitchy goth thin-eyebrowed bitching bitch bitcherton. And I can't blame them...the theme was very "rawr". So I went froofy instead. I like the froofy better anyway, and I can put a picture of something I really want...like the sand writing by my shmoochiekins.

So thats that explanation.

Now, on to the gazoongas!

I've mentioned quite a few times that I have three jobs. Well it is high time I get rid of one of them. Yesterday I put my two weeks in at "OB". I've only had this one for about a month and a half, and though I was so excited about the Free adventures and rentals...I really haven't been able to take advantage of those things. Pretty much I've done nothing but be a shop bitch. I organize the skiis, vacuum, data entry, ring up stuff...it's very unrewarding for me. Beyond that though, it's also the least paying job I have and the least flexible.

I've had next to NO time to study for my GRE that I'm taking in T-minus 16 days. I tried studying at OB while it was very slow and got a polite but stern "don't do that" (understandably). I also have a research paper to write and such. I just don't have time. Not to mention the 13 hour work days I have when I go from that job to RR. So I'm quitting.

I was very nervous about telling them since it's such a small business and they chose me because they thought I would commit, even though I don't have the specific knowledge needed for the job. But they took it very well. I guess the big test is when I go in today and how they're going to act the next day.

*sigh* 6 hours at this job is hellish. I dont waaaannnnaaaa go!

*POP!*

Oh my GOD! That was so scary.

I'm a wuss. And my California cherry has now been officially popped. I JUST experienced my first earthquake. And I did NOT handle it gracefully.

First, let me preface this with explaining what I was doing at the time. Shel is at school and our friend Joseph just left the house after helping me decide on my costume for tomorrow. I'm going to be Alice from Resident Evil, the first one. It's with the red dress torn up and such...here:



I remembered this red dress I had in the closet, turned it inside out, put some black biking shorts on and had my hair in pig tails (to get the short hair effect). Needless to say I wasn't wearing much. Not to mention that when Joseph came over I showed him Shel's Alice in wonderland costume and pointed out a few other costumes she had, including a cop one that she looks totally hot in. I put on the hat...so here I am, bare feet, skimpy red dress, half tucked in to get the rip effect and short biker shorts...with a cop hat on.

Anyway, he left and I went into the bedroom to start changing out of my outfit when suddenly the windows start shaking! My mind is confused...is it thunder? loud music? a dinosaur?? A...a...a FUCKING EARTHQUAKE???? The rumbling picks up and the whole apartment is shaking. I scream "Oh My GOD!!!" and sprint out of the room trying to remember what I learned in elementary school - the last time I lived in California. Images flashed through my head, get under my desk and cover? Get in the door frame? Get out of the building??!

So here I am running toward the front door, I decide on getting out of the building, open the door...hear my neighbors open their door...then see my silhouette on the wall right outside our door. Cop Hat and all. I SLAM the door before the neighbors can see me in my outfit and run back into the room stripping off the costume as I go. By the time I got my dress up over my boobs the shaking stopped.

But did that stop the shaking of my OWN body? Fuck no. I was so scared! What if it starts again? That was a LONG time! And it was BIG! All I hear about earthquakes is how gentle they feel and you cant even tell sometimes. FUCK THAT! That was like someone grabbed my apartment and started shaking it.

So I grabbed my phone and started calling Joseph, half hoping he'd come back and protect me from the house falling on me. But the service wasn't working. So I texted Shel, but THAT didn't go through. So of course I'm thinking all the satellite antenna are down...until finally Shel texts me "feel that?". Phew. The earth didn't open up and swallow her.

That was scary. K, I'm calmer now.

It is now 8:27 pm on Tuesday, October 30th 2007. My first earthquake... *check*

Shel just texted me that it was a 5.8!!! According to this page, thats serious shit. Yikes!

Apparently a 5.8 means that people run out of their houses. But I...well I just cant do that in my red skanky outfit. I obviously would rather be crushed to death than be seen pre-halloween in my outfit.

As you probably know, one of my three jobs is that I am a waitress. Or as we are called there, a "sales team member". In the past, when I owned my own business and was going to school, I used to think "Maybe I should get a service job. It seems like a position everyone has had at one point and would teach me many things!" And now I am one.

Before you start to think this is a bash about waitressing...I actually really like the job. I get to interact with a lot of new people and have made a lot of fun friends! My social life has increased about 200% since when I was in school (when I say social life, I don't mean that my on line friends are not part of that...I more mean a "Real Life" social life). I flirt, I laugh, I talk gossip, I swear, and occasionally I go out and hang.

I also have learned TONS of humility, as serving jobs will teach. I've had to be outgoing and social, confident and quick thinking - all things that have been wonderfully enriching for me. And I shant forget the enjoyment I truly get when I come by someone's table for a check-up asking "How is everything guys??" and receive the big-eyed, thumb's up, mumble "Gmmreaatt!" and the like. Or when a suggestion I made was just what the person was looking for.

On top of that, I have experienced the full effects of Karma. Several years ago I had taken part in my share of Dine and Dashing, or leaving without tipping. I now know the frustration of that for the server. I also know basically how to identify those that are more likely to do it to me...and you guessed it, my 19-20 year old self fit that description quite nicely. I'd like to send out a big Cosmic "I'M SOOOOOO SORRY!" to the servers I screwed over those times.

And of course there are the nightly tips. I love walking away with a wad of cash each shift, it's perfect for the instant gratification nut in me. Not that I go out and spend it...those tips get split in half: 1/2 into the "Car Jar" and 1/2 into the "Rent Jar". Except on Tuesdays. Tuesdays are "Tattoo Tip Tuesdays" and they go into the Tattoo Jar.

(I'm not kidding about jars. Shel and I have several pickle/sauce/peanut butter jars in our room for the above mentioned purposes as well as a travel jar which gets all our change, except quarters. Quarters go to the Laundry zip-lock in the junk drawer)

But anyway, back to the original intention of this blog...waitress pet peeves.

If you've never been a waitress or waiter, you may not be aware of some of these things...and YOU may do them while eating out. So pay attention, this could be educational for you and a blessing to your server.

• If you're not ready to order when I ask you, that's fine. I probably have a million other things to be doing while you're deciding and have no problem coming back in a few minutes. However, if you say you are ready don't make me stand there silently waiting while you battle it out between two different menu items. Choose one, ask me for a suggestion, or tell me to come back!!
• If you ask me for a suggestion, that's fine. But I'm not going to lie to you. If I haven't tried the two items you are confused about I'm going to tell you that and suggest the most popular. Don't look at me like I'm an alien because I haven't eaten EVERYTHING on the menu...it's not free you know.
  
• I'm happy for you that you are meeting your date/party/parents/high school girlfriends here, that's great! Yay reunions and good times. But if they're not going to show up for another 30 mins to an hour...please don't sit at my table waiting! I only have 4 tables in my section, I need that one to make money! The longer you sit there ordering free refills and no food, the few guests I can "move through" that table.
  
• The above peeve also applies to people that arrive together but "camp out" for an hour after they have finished their meal. I need those seats dern it! If you are going to sit there for so long, please be considerate and tip me very well, not simply 10-12%.
  
• If you come in with a party of 15 and you all have very specific drink orders, please be patient. Refilling 2 cokes, 1 root beer, 3 dr. peppers, 7 waters, 2 margarita's, and so on is a lot of work. Especially because the dark sodas look the same to me. If I give you coke instead of root beer, please just pass it along to the right person after your first taste. Don't throw a fit. I try to remember what 1 straw vs. 3 straws means.
• On that note...don't fuggin' CHUG your drink! I hate having to refill someone's drink every two mins. Do, however, place the empty glass on the outside of the table so I can easily see it from across the restaurant and get a new one before you have to ask.
• I respect you're on a diet. Though I don't think it was the best idea to come to a BURGER JOINT while dieting. If you want to know what dressings are low-fat I'll tell you. DO NOT ask me for the calorie count for each dressing!!! Either don't get dressing, research it before hand, or take a chance and have the fat free Italian. I'm not your dietitian, and I really have so many things to do besides go into the back and check the dressing bottles in storage.
  
• If you have a gift card that covers only some of your meal, please remember your TOTAL bill when you tip me. Your credit card may only be charged $12, but your entire meal (and my sales) was $75... $2 is not an appropriate tip for a $75 bill. I put the original bill on top of your credit card for a REASON!
• If I go through the trouble to split your bill between 5 people, charging 5 different credit cards, providing 5 of my perfectly good pens to sign, please DO NOT assume that your friend is going to pay the entire tip. Usually they are NOT, and that means you've left me no tip...bum. Be an adult, and tip me yourself or decide among yourself who is going to leave the tip...and again, remember the TOTAL bill...not just the $7 you're being charged.
  
• I have to greet a countless number of people throughout the shift. I try to be original and creative for you. However, if I default to my routine perky greeting for lack of instant creativity...don't roll your eyes like I'm an emotionless serving robot. Underneath this red polo and shiny buttons I'm a full blooded person that is tired of working just as much as you were earlier. Not to mention I'm a fuggin pimp and can kick your ass.
  
• Look lady...I'm sorry you and your dude are having a fight. But if he smiles at me and I'm friendly with him as a guest, don't dock my tips. I'm friendly with you too, you're just too insecure and possessive to notice it. Besides I'm gay, and more likely to eye YOUR cleavage than anything he's got! Mwahahaha! (Warning to readers- servers can see cleavage VERY easy if you're sportin' it. We're about three feet taller than you while you're sitting!)
• Yes we have bottomless fries. Yes you can have them out first. Please don't make me get you 20 baskets and get upset if I can't bring them out fast enough. They take time to cook and every other guest is begging for them too.
  
• While signing your credit card receipt, I know you're in a hurry to get out. But please, if you're just going to round your total up to the nearest dollar, please WRITE the tip amount in. I don't like math, and I get yelled at if I whip my phone out to calculate the difference. Not to mention this USUALLY means you're not tipping as much as you think you are. $55.67 rounded up to $60 only leaves me $4.33 tip...not even 10%.
  
• Do NOT wave me over with the finger curl. A polite nod or small wave is fine. I'll be right over...but if you "come hither" me with those beady eyes I'll sneeze on your guacamole burger. Haha! (Not really, but you're a douche).
  

I think thats it for now. Can you think of any?

A few months ago I could clean our apartment everyday. It was part of my day, to pick up our place after seeing Shel off to work. I had tons of time on my hands. Now without that much time, cleaning takes a back seat to work and cuddling. And the best way to get me to MAKE time to clean is to tell me we're having company. I guess it's something I picked up from my family- no way is the house going to be messy if someone is coming over!

This weekend we'll be having Shel's mom and brother over, which set me into a cleaning frenzy this morning. I'm sure they wouldn't mind a dirty apartment with clothes strewn everywhere and such, but I don't like it. I've been meaning to clean anyway.

I'm one of those people that are worried about getting poison cleaning chemicals on them, but not afraid enough to put on gloves and not touch it. I think it's more my ignorance on what the chemicals could do to me that makes me worried. One thing that's always seemed really toxic to me is Comet. It come's in that aluminum can with the holes, resembling a Parmesan cheese container...which is strange...but for some reason it's crappy design and powderyness always worries me. How can something that you let sit on a surface for a couple of minutes, then remove to suddenly see a bright and shining reflection of yourself, be safe? So I always try to hold my breath when I'm using it. The powder that flies everywhere (again, what a HORRIBLE design) is bound to get in my nose, in fact I'm sure I can feel it cleaning and shining my nostrils right now.

Anyway, I did the shusshle of the comet all over our metal sink, spread it around in a thin chemically layer, let it sit for 15 mins, and then went back to rinse it. As I rinsed I realized...wait a minute...this toxic Comet water...where is it going?? Watching it was down the drain is relieving in one way because the poison isn't near my nose...but...now it's in the WATER! Sure not the water I'm going to use right now, but it's in the water system. It's going down the drain, into the sewer, mixing with all the other sewer waters containing chemicals, waste, tinkle, and who KNOWS what else!

What the HELL???

I know the water goes through a processing plant, but I BET it can't get all my Comet molecules out of the water. It's not clean before it gets recycled back into the drinking water, tap water, toilet water, or even worse...the oceans, lakes, and rivers.

I think we forget that we have a set amount of H20 on this planet. It's just being constantly recycled, SEE?

Oh man...we really are in a world of hurt unless we figure out how not to do this anymore. I think I'm going to start using only biodegradable and non-toxic cleaners. I shall propose this to others, because this is just scary. We're going to have Comet Rain!!! Comet Rain and Poop Hail!

Of course there are other cycles that we have to be worried about.

The carbon cycle:

Which our use of fossil fuels is NOT helping, as we bring more and more petroleum up from way down under and introduce it into the atmosphere. Our poor plants...can they fix it all? No probably not.

WHY!? WHY WHY WHY?? Why are we not taking this stuff more seriously? We have all the tools necessary to start the serious migration away from these types of death habits. We have alternative fuels such as biodiesel, veggie oil, ethanol, hell even electric (just got "Who Killed the Electric Car from netflix by the way, I gotta watch that! This rant isn't spurred from watching it.)! We have alternatives to nuclear power in solar, wind, and so on.

It's just sad. And all we can do is change our own actions. Take our own little steps to try and make things better. I just hope all our little efforts make a difference in the long run. Or hell...the short run, cuz I don't know how much longer we can ignore these types of problems.

Here's some stuff to think about and maybe can start doing in your home and life:

• Over 100 pesticide ingredients are suspected to cause birth defects, cancer, and gene mutation.
  
• See HERE for some examples of Earth Friendly products. They're readily available at Targets and Walmarts too!
• Turn off the monitor when you leave your office, even for a short meeting.  "Screen saver" does not save much energy (less than 10%).
• Every ton of recycled office paper saves 380 gallons of oil.
• Glass produced from recycled glass instead of raw materials reduces related air pollution by 20%, and water pollution by 50%.
• Americans use 50 million tons of paper annually -- consuming more than 850 million trees.
• One ton of carbon dioxide that is released in the air can be prevented by replacing every 75 watt light bulbs with energy efficient bulbs, such as these that are available at Walmarts and Targets.
• Every day 50 to 100 species of plants and animals become extinct as their habitat and human influences destroy them.

Hell...lets just try and do common sense things to reduce our effect as much as possible. Please?

End hippy rant.

Back in the day I got this huge kick to do a little research project on 360. I wanted to see if there was any correlation between personality types and people who blog and chat. I created this big ol' survey that was connected to a personality test and so on. Then I posted it on my blog and tried to get as many 360'ers to take it as possible.

I still haven't completed the data entry for that thing, unfortunately. The project was way more than I had expected!
Now I have a new idea. This one is actually more for my Masters entry paper, but I can't help but keep in mind the potential to share it with the on line world. It's a job-satisfaction study/survey. The more I dig into Industrial/Organizational psychology, the more I love its potential. Which is a GREAT feeling for me! I'm finally finding some verification that this return-to-damn-school idea is a good one, and also that I have chosen the right path.

So this study I'm going to do will help me write my entry paper to my Masters studies, as I said. I've done some research and found a really important study by Hackmen et al, about a strategy for evaluating and improving both the employees' job satisfaction as well as the "motivating potential" of the job itself. These are topics that turn my brain on crazy-like. To me the idea of helping people find enjoyment and motivation in one of the most significant "part of life" activities that we do, is thrilling. Especially because it's usually an activity most people hate. Most people spend 1/3 of their life sleeping...well considering most people only sleep like 6-8 hours and work 8-9...that means we must work around 1/3 too! Well not really because we don't work on the weekends, usually, and not as kids...but you get the idea. So I see it as essential that people find fulfillment in their jobs to have a healthy and happy life.

Funny that I would find a satisfying job in trying to make other people's job satisfying!

Anyway, of course I've gone total geek on this (in a good way), and prepared a survey as well as an excel to collect and calculate the data in an instant. I'm so excited to start handing out the survey! But don't get too excited, the paper isn't going to be about the job satisfaction of random on line friends, though you are more than welcome to take the survey or hand it out to your work groups. The paper and my focused study is going to be about the job satisfaction of restaurant employees. It will be much easier for me to make a "controlled" study if I can get the results from one place, and especially a place I'm familiar with. So that means I'm planning on handing my survey out at RR. Also, I'm thinking about seeing if I can convince other restaurants in the area to ask their employees to take it too- this way I can do a short comparison in my paper...and of course offer the restaurants a comparison of their location to others in the area (that will be my selling point to them).

Fun huh? I'm so excited about it! And the clock is ticking down til my application has to be in. Gah! I just registered for the GRE the other day, now I have to try and find time to study for it. Yikes!